Where Shalt Thou Work?!

A couple of years ago I would never really imagined I'd be wondering what type of career I wanted in the near future!  I never really saw myself as a stay-at-home mom.  I had a career I loved and felt passionate about.  I always thought working part-time once I had children sounded pretty ideal, but there aren't many good teaching jobs that are part-time, so it never really seemed like much of an option.  When I was pregnant with MJ, I planned on taking 12 weeks of maternity leave, then having a nice summer off with him, and then returning to teaching that next fall.  I'd toured day cares, even decided on one, and thought I was set.  Then, Iowa fell in our laps out of nowhere!  I had no clue what I would do as far as working.  I dreaded the idea of beginning in a new district, new school, in a new state, where I knew no one, with a new baby and no knowledge of local day cares.

My position I received pretty quickly at Loras College seemed too good to be true!  They were looking for someone with their Master's in Literacy to work part-time at the college.  It was a position that would allow me to work part-time still in my field and build connections with the school districts.  It was a grant-funded positions that was only for 2 years, but that seemed perfect at the time.  It was just long enough for me to get settled and get comfortable and most likely be ready to return to teaching and working full time at the end of those two years.  The pay was great, for part-time work, it's just a short walk from my house, and the hours were completely flexible.  Hard to complain about that!  It hasn't been the perfect job.  What job is? Working in an office with no windows has been a huge change from being on my feet most of the day in a classroom full of lively children.  I've certainly had my moments of boredom or not feeling used to my potential, but for the most part, the job was an answered prayer.  Even though it wasn't the perfect job necessarily, it was perfect for me at this time. It came along at the PERFECT time in my life!  Also, during this time I interviewed for and gained employment at Ashford University (also in Iowa, but about an hour away) and begin working for them online as a Teaching Assistant.  Another pretty good job that was ideal timing.  It's been a chance for me to earn extra money, utilize my writing skills, and work from HOME completely on my own schedule.  Not bad! 

Well, not only are those 2 years of my contracted position quickly coming to an end before long, but I've also been longing to be at home a bit more than I ever imagined!  I currently have Mondays and Fridays off, and I have really enjoyed those days at home.  I like being able to stay on top of cleaning, laundry, etc. as well as have some time to do special things with MJ like story time or a trip to the park, and even some things for myself like working on projects and crafts around the house.  Definitely not something I imagined being so important to me, but it's weird how motherhood changes a girl! 

Soooo, I thought everything was starting to fall into place like perfect.  Ashford University was looking to hire professors to teach online ( a step up from my current position with them).  Although they prefer a PhD, only a Master's was required, so I decided to apply!  After a month long interview process, I got the job.  I actually begin teaching my first class the end of this month.  It's all online and on my own time, but definitely requires a bit more time commitment than my current position with them.  My plan was to begin this new position with Ashford while finishing out my time at Loras through the summer and then beginning next school year, I'd just work from home for Ashford.  Sounded like a pretty good plan, but I still was having some doubts.  I thrive on "me time" and like having adult time and am worried that being home all the time, I will be even more secluded, less likely to meet and make friends in the area, and might get a little stir crazy.  Not to mention the few professional connections I've made in the area will kind of fizzle out leaving me a bit high and dry should I attempt to get a teaching job in the area in the coming years.  On the up side though, I felt like with adding a second, and possibly third child, into our family in the near future, this was perfect timing.  I could have a lot of flexibility with my work but still continue to earn some income while also being able to dedicate even more time to family. 

And then I saw a job ad.  Darn, curious, intrigued me just had to apply.  It was for a position at a university in Illinois for a Reading Instructor and Field Experiences Supervisor (teaching reading courses and supervising student teachers).  Sounded right up my alley!  Had a phone interview, they checked my references, and then contacted me to set up a face to face interview.  It was intimidating.  They had my whole day mapped out including teaching a class, an interview with the department, a tour of the campus, and interview with administration.  It was serious!  And all the time my gut was screaming "no!"  It was over an hour drive from home and was going to entail working on campus everyday.  HUGE lifestyle change!  I decided not to take on the next part of the interview process because I knew in my heart that it just wasn't a job I was willing to take on in the end.  BUT that very same week I saw another job ad.  Seriously, I must stop looking at job postings!!!!  This time it was for a local university, just less than 5 minutes from my house.  They were advertising for a tenure track education faculty member.  Tenure-track is huge in the academia world.  It means job security, higher rank, and better pay!  It also requires a PhD.  I didn't really have all the qualifications, but definitely had some, so I figured I'd throw my hat in the ring!  I found out that as long as I was willing to work towards my PhD, they'd consider me. I was contacted for a phone interview.  I thought it went okay, but not great.  Within 30 minutes they called me back to schedule a face to face interview.  This time I knew I wanted to go for it!  To get this job would be a big deal!  Teaching at a university in my town with a tenure track is about as good as it could get.

 BUT my gut is still in knots.  Even though I love the idea of the job, I'm just not sure I love it right now.  It's what I want a little bit down the road.  It caught my eye for a reason though, so I am going forward with it and seeing what happens.  So tomorrow I go and teach a college class to a group of 20 students as well as the whole education department which will be sitting in along with two members of administration.  Then, I have a face to face interview with the education department.  Intimidating?  Yes!  Nervous?  You bet!  But, I am realllllly trying to stay calm and peaceful about this and just leave it in the Lord's hands.  I am hoping that if it's meant for be for me to work from home over the next couple years, then I just don't get the job offer and it makes my decision easy.  I promise to swear off the help-wanted ads if that's the case!!!  It's not like I'll be without a job.  I can teach for Ashford and be happy with that while enjoying some more time with my little guy!  And if I do get a job offer?  Then, I'm going to really have to think about it.  I'd like to think that it means that it's meant to be.  If the schedule were right, I could see being happy with it.  It would bring about a bid of sadness too, but might be good for all of us in the long run as well.

I know this has been one big ramble and truly just a vent session for me and what I've mostly been keeping bottled up over the last couple months. I wanted to document what's going on and the pros and cons of it all so that I can one day look back on this.   Before my career was really all about me and what made me happy, and now my family comes first in my eyes.  It's really been taking its toll on me just worrying about it all, and I think I'm going to really be happy to  have a decision in the next couple weeks and then a plan!!  I'm a planner and I like to know what's around the corner next. 

Wish me luck, and perhaps say a little prayer, that it works out just as it is supposed to be!!